As some of you may know by that cute little button to the left, I have a blended family. I do not discuss it on my blog because they are not my children and it is not my place to voice my opinions of them or our living situation all over the internet. I try and find creative outlets, such as Blissfully Domestic, to vent help others in my situation. Oh, and of course, there is this fabulous girl who totally gets it. But all in all I keep everything to myself.
There have been many a times I sit down, write an awesomely (yes, it IS a word) ranting post only to hit delete. Sadly, when I hit delete on my computer, the issues are still there at home. I will say that my Hubby - he rawks and I wouldn't trade him for anything. But his ex - man alive. If I could continuously run something over with my car - it would be her. I know, I know. It sounds petty. But the thrill of that bump bump as the tires went over and over and over her would bring this lassie such glee.
Did I mention she is remarried (10 years) with children of their own. Her husband is very well endowed and is able to provide her with many luxuries as well as the ability to not work. Yeah for her. I actually don't give a rat's arse. What I do care about is the fact that she has the audacity to come after us for child support when we share custody and placement and pay for half of every thing! Did I mention that her husband made 2.6 million dollars the other year. No seriously, he did. Sick isn't it. I will also take this moment to point out that Hubby and I make nowhere near that. Heck, we aren't even in the same playing field even if you take off a few zeros.
With that being said the court felt that because she didn't work and my Hubby did, he should give half of his check to her - cause she is so financially hurting and all. Where is the justice in that?? Seriously people. How does the court system think that is fair? My Hubby works his tail off while she has lunch and shops with friends..... hmmmm. Meanwhile we have to rebudget for the huge decrease in salary Oh wait - now I see how it is fair. *snark, snark*
Me running her over with my car doesn't sound so bad now does it? Off to hit publish and not look back!
9 comments:
I don't know about all this blended "PC" crap, but I feel your pain. No, really, I do. Robin has inherited my son, and has been an awesome Step-Mom for the past 4 1/2 years. She has had to endure my ex wife, which though it's improved, I left for a reason, right?
There's no easy fix, no right or wrong, and certainly no "Justice". My ex puts us through the wringer some times, and we have similar conversations along the "bump bump" theme. In the end, we know it wont fix anything. That's why we visit http://agoodtimewithwine.com often ;)
I think the only solution is to realize HE left for a reason, and accept her for what she is. No, that doesn't help with the rebudgeting and the money issues. And nothing but perhaps appealing to her sensibilities will work. Perhaps saying "With our giving $xx to you each month, it forces us to have to hold back things from the kids like trips or whatever" may work. Or, maybe not. Either way, dont let it eat you up. Life's too short to get mad and stew over it.
Yeah .. I know you're now thinking "bump bump" about me .. because I've done nothing but say "shh, relax, deal with it" in nice, flowery words. If I wasn't walking in your shoes, I wouldn't know your pain. God woman, get sensible shoes. ;)
-Matt
I'm so glad you put your feelings out there! It has to feel better than holding it in. I'll cross my fingers for you to win powerball, or better yet for her husband to lose his job, and her have to scrub dishes for a living, that'll show her!
Girl your preachin to the choir! Don't get me started on CS (child support)! We kept an attorney on retainer during those CS years.
When I married my current (2nd) husband he was paying CS for his two girls and I had two teenagers at home. The early years of our marriage, He worked to pay his child support and I worked to support all of us. CS even tried to keep us paying the same amount when his oldest one graduated from school. We had to go back to court to get it reduced to just the one child who quit school. It was suppose to change according to the agreement but we had to pay an attorney to make them honor the agreement!
EVERY month my husband would get a letter threatening to put him in jail for 30 days IF he did not pay his support. He paid EVERY month and the CS agency would not send her the checks on a regular basis. She would complain and instead of admitting their mistake they would send a letter to threaten him with jail! We had to take our receipts in to prove he was paying every month because they were keeping the money. It is like a Nazi organization. Meanwhile, I did not receive ANY CS for my two. I was told it depended on the county you divorced in and weather or not said county will enforce it. Apparently the county we divorced in did not.
Now my son has had to move in with us because after working as an electrician all week he brings home $250.00 wk in his paycheck. The rest goes to CS for two kids he/we have never been allowed to see! They will not enforce the visitation agreement either.
I realize there are Fathers who won't pay, my kids were victims of one of those deadbeats. But the things those people do borders on illegal if not out right illegal!
YIKES. That sucks!!! Sometimes "the system" makes no sense at all.
Well, that just sucks! Now I'd like to know how YOU know how well endowed he is! Or, is this only
an American expression?
since i didn't believe you about the baby, what is there in this story that is more believable....well that you would have feelings like that for another woman is understandable since mosts DIVA'S are so caty KATY, your know kat ty
I would see if that decision could be appealed - I thought they based those kinds of decisions on the household income - which means the ex-wife's household should have to pay, not your household.
That has got to be SO frustrating!!
I love you. You know it. You're doing an awesome job - it's not easy, for sure.
<3
Being a product of divorce, and seeing my parents go through what you're going through I know Stacy is right. It's based on household income so the EX is more then likely lieing....I'd get an appeal. Maybe catching her in her lie would be more fun (and not involve you going to prison) then running her over in your car ^_^. Good Luck!
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